It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything here. Life kept marching on, and I didn’t feel like I had anything to say until now. The past 8 months have been a roller coaster. The most recent being the sudden death of my beloved orange cat, Phoenix. This happened 2 days ago. He was at the animal hospital having surgery to remove stones from his bladder. The surgery went well, and he was recovering well. Then he had a heart attack the morning of 4/29/25 while at the hospital. I won’t go into further details. But I’m absolutely devastated. Upon hearing the news I alternated between sobbing and guttural screams. The wind picked up, rain poured from the skies later that day. It was like mother nature was in mourning with me.

Heartbreak has physical pain. I felt like I was moving into the numbness phase of grief, but his ashes came home today, and everything came flooding back. My heart is heavy. There’s a lump in my throat.

This is the third cat to pass over the past 8 months. Zombo died in December of 2024. She was an elderly cat, but it was still a shock. I found her gone one morning. She was a sweet girl. I only had her for a year, and I hope that she had a good life during that year.

Artemis died at the end of August 2024, 3 days before I was to have surgery to remove 3 disks from my neck. His health declined quickly, and had to be taken to the vet to be put to sleep due to heart failure. Apparently it was a long time coming, and the vet was surprised he didn’t pass sooner. Phoenix and Artemis loved each other. They often slept curled up together. Months after Artemis died, if his name was said, Phoenix would look around the house for him. If there is life after death, I know that they are together again.

I know it will take time, but damnit this is painful. My heart is broken.